Flag Day has come and gone; there’s no Monday holiday. I largely have left Monday humor to Garfield over the years, but I’ve done my share. In fact, I’m pretty busy this morning, but I wanted to send up this rare Monday post to get things off on the right track this week, to make up for the couple of days I missed last week while traveling.
Rise and Whine
By Jimmy Johnson
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25 responses to “Rise and Whine”
I’ll bet you could do it better than Garfield. Here’s a challenge: do a full week of Monday jokes (yeah, that means you’d be doing them on Tuesday, Wednesday, etc. but it would make it clear that you’re doing a series) and make them all different.
Good morning. This is starting out to be a “Monday” for me. I managed to knock my bottle of coffee creamer over a full cup of coffee, coffee everywhere on the counter. Then I knocked the spoon out of my cereal, milk all over the table. When my alarm went off it seemed as if I had just gone to bed. At least I got the worst out of the way early, (I hope). May today be better for the rest of you!
Working from home has created less anxiety for Mondays. Kind of like last year when I greatly reduced my commute. My only real anxiety is that somehow people can see me during conference calls laying on the couch. I figure I am OK as long as I don’t nod off and start snoring….
Wouldn’t want to be like the strip where Arlo wakes up in a conference room, thinking “the meeting must be over”. And then, “I wonder where the blanket came from?”.
Happy Monday Mourning! 😉
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“Middle age is when a man is warned to slow down by a doctor instead of a policeman.”
— Sidney Brody
Today’s TIP topic may be political, but not sure in which direction. It is whimsical.
https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2020/06/15
Peace,
Jimmy, you mentioned you traveled last week. I read the most interesting article from the author Mark Childress. Apparently he is quite well known in the business of writing novels, but this article was in Saturday’s WSJ Off Duty. Apparently he now lives in New Orleans and decided he had to “get out of town” after having been isolated for weeks/months. He flew to San Francisco then drove back via Utah, New Mexica, Texas to New Orleans. A big part of his article was how COVID 19 affected the trip. Side note, he did graduate from the Univ of AL, but I can forgive him for that.
For most people, the problem with Monday is that you’ve been able to sleep late for two days and now have to go back to waking up at your normal time. Even those two days have gotten your sleep rhythm off which is why you’re not properly awake when you go into work.
Until the shutdown affected Sunday church schedules, I never got to sleep in on Sundays since I run a Sunday School program and also provide services as a volunteer chaplain at the state hospital… which has also closed its doors to volunteers due to the virus. Saturdays were my only day for sleeping in.
Saturday is also the only day I can sleep in. Some weeks it is my “Sabbath”.
Yesterday, for the first time in months, my church met in mini-services (6′ apart) for distribution of Holy Communion. It was a thrill – better than viewing services electronically (with only the officiant, organist, and maybe 5 spaced choir members really present). Next Sunday, using the spacious meeting place, there will be regular services…still with 6′ spacing or better.
For those curious, the bread/wafer and wine were commercial products sealed in separate hourglass-like containers but with top and bottom surfaces replaced by seals. The one section had the bread/wafer sealed with a pullable cover while the other had a bit of wine similarly sealed. (Think of the inner seal on a medicine container.)
At the proper time, the bread/wafer section was opened and the content ingested, then the wine section, ditto. It was about as germ free as I could imagine.
A couple of the churches I attended in Tennessee were using those years ago, but of course it was grape juice instead of wine since they were neither Episcopal nor Catholic. I believe they were doing it then as an alternative to someone having to portion everything out ahead of time and then wash up afterwards.
I seem to have lost at least part of a line. The several mini-services were for <10 persons each time, in the parking lot. One had to sign up to avoid having too many show up at one time. A couple of them were reserved for us geezers.
I converted to Catholism when I married. I love the Saturday night Mass as I can either sleep in or get in a long run on Sunday morning.
BTW, I like chicken salad. We also put grapes, almonds and pasta in it. My wife will add celery and onion to hers as I don’t care for either
I also like peanut butter, sometimes not when it’s the featured ingredient. I absolutely will not eat peanut butter and jelly. Separately, but not together.
Published a column re peanut butter 19 yr. ago. Let’s see if it fits:
Real peanut butter. Copyright © 2001, 2002, 2007 Evan B. Hazard.
“Rhubarb Pie and Cheese” was my first Community Journal, in September ’98. It could have been “How do you know if you won’t try it?” since it concerned my growing willingness, starting as a teenager, to try new foods. Today, let’s do peanut butter. I’ve always liked it, but just as an accompaniment for jelly, marmalade, or occasionally bacon or sliced dills. In the early ’60s, there was a prof at Bemidji State who, his wife said, would eat peanut butter with anything. He seemed ok otherwise, and they were a delightful couple. Maybe he had something.
Of the many students who lived with us over the years, one, in the mid ’80s, used to eat peanut butter with chocolate ice cream (calorie and fat city, but she stayed slim). I tried it and liked it, but later found it went better with vanilla ice cream. In the last several years, ice cream makers have caught on, marketing various concoctions, often involving chocolate ice cream and miniature peanut butter cups.
But the “peanut butter” in those cups is sweet, as it is in ordinary peanut butter cup candy. Why bother to put sugar in the peanut filling in an already sweet candy, or in miniature candies that are in sweet ice cream? One answer is that standard commercial peanut butter is sweet. Some people will eat only “Bouncy” (I made that up). I guess they find Bouncy’s percent of sugar and hydrogenated (artery-clogging) oils is just right. We prefer simply ground peanuts. In the ’30s, that’s all peanut butter was, usually plus salt. The oil, of course, separated, which was an annoyance. So they homogenized it, added hydrogenated vegetable oils and sugar, and made it “smooooth” (unless you wanted it chunky).
Today, you can rarely get unhomogenized, additive-free peanut butter in stores. Some places will grind peanuts for you in the store, but that’s expensive. We order 5-quart buckets at a co-op: it comes plain or chunky, salted or unsalted, in all four combinations. We get the plain unsalted, stir it, divide it into smaller containers, and keep the extras in the fridge.*
Mostly, our peanut butter goes on dark bread, English muffins, or bagels, plus honey, apricot jam, or marmalade. (Why does orange-peel jam have its own word?) It also makes a nice sundae. Rather than mix the peanut butter with the vanilla ice cream, just put a dollop on the side and take a smidgen with each spoonful. This is not a diet dessert.
This summer’s discovery resulted from low-key logic: Jam, which goes well with peanut butter, is a mixture of fruit and sugar. Rhubarb pie filling is a mixture of fruit and sugar. Therefore, peanut butter might go well on rhubarb pie (instead of cheese of some sort, vanilla ice cream, plain yogurt, or a mixture of plain yogurt and non-dairy topping). It’s great, but there’s a physical problem. None of those other accompaniments is sticky. Elaine makes a splendid, flaky, oil crust. Spreading sticky peanut butter on it peels flakes off the pie and makes a mess. Solution: a dollop of peanut butter on the side. You can start your diet tomorrow.
There are other nut butters, such as almond butter and sesame-seed butter (tahini). They cost more, are not as sticky, and have their own distinctive flavors. All are high calorie, but low in artery-clogging fats. Tahini is somewhat bitter, but goes very well with clover (ordinary) honey on a toasted sesame-seed bagel. My favorite honey, buckwheat, is hard to come by, but we can order it at the store where we order peanut butter. Buckwheat is pungent honey, and combining it with tahini is overkill. But it goes well with real peanut butter.
*As of 2006, the 5 qt. buckets are no longer available, but that co-op carries approximately one-pound plastic containers of unsweetened, unsalted, non-homogenized real peanut butter, both smooth and chunky. I’m beginning to prefer the chunky. 656 8.1 publ 010814, rev.
From laaate Sunday eaarly Monday
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From when music was music and you could sing along without worry.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kch2apoV490
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emb there is a beekeeper that has Buckwheat Honey that he pedals at the Thresher Shows,
I have a jar I am waiting for the right moment to open. Also Root Beer.
Had a jar of Buckwheat that I was savoring – MIL mixed in Karo :-(((( not happy.
If you are desperate I will share.
the unadulterated stuff
REALLY enjoyed those songs. Some I didn’t remember, but most of them brought a smile to my face – and heart…
The unadulterated stuff –
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Our son liked Peanut Butter & Bologna.
Re predictions did I mention that the Seminoles will be undefeated in the coming football season? As will the Gators, the Hurricanes,and last years national champs in their division the Argos and every other team in Florida?
emb is so far out of the loop he’s in Waukegan. I recognized maybe 2 of those songs. Was surprised that “Smoke gets in your eyes” was so recent. Thought I recalled it from the ’40s.
Now, there’s progress. Tobacco reek was once everywhere. A now-retiring MD actually lit up at my first office visit in ’82; I suggested that was inappropriate, & I think he has since quit.
Peace,
When I was new to driving, most truck stops still allowed smoking everywhere. That had changed in most states and in the bigger truck stop chains by the time I had to quit. The remaining exceptions were in states that allow gambling machines and casinos in the truck stops.
Some people and their pets are, well, different:
https://www.ksl.com/article/46765698/have-you-seen-this-gator-on-the-loose-is-no-big-deal
Today’s strip (6/17/20) reminded me that years ago Ted Nugent’s wife was interested in writing a novel and asked my wife for advice. She was pleasant and my wife and her traded a few letters and phone calls. That Christmas we got the Nugent Christmas card, which included a picture of the family. Living in Michigan, I decided to show it to the Engineers that I called on and they were incredibly excited and impressed. This was before he became more widely known for his politics…