Obesity has become a real problem in this country; we all know that. I’ve heard a lot of theories about why that is. Some of them make sense, but I have my own theory that I haven’t heard voiced elsewhere. I believe people began getting fatter in direct proportion to the length of commercial breaks on television. Think about it! We all have to do something to fill the one-third of airtime that is now devoted to advertisements. Makes sense to me.
I didn’t say anything about the passing of Robin Williams yesterday, because it was news to me when I was updating this page. I just didn’t know much. Plus, I knew there’d be a lot said by others, and I was right. There was a third reason, maybe. I didn’t want to make any comment that might be construed as negative at such a time. That comment would have been: I have always thought Robin Williams was best as a dramatic actor. Of course, that isn’t a negative thing to say, but with so many emphasizing his original and frenetic approach to comedy, I just didn’t see going into it. Also, let us remember Betty Bacall, who left us yesterday.
334 responses to “Back after This…”
Mindy, I laughed about the convenience store confessions and conversation center because people do same thing with their florists. As a florist you are often in the middle of some crisis in peoples’ lives, whether a death, a marriage, a birth, the dog house, so you learn to listen and keep your mouth shut. Forever.
Mike used to laugh that when I sold cars I would know everyone’s life story and history by the time they got off the demonstration ride and have sold them a car. That is because good salesmen get people to talk about themselves, not blather about the product. It is what they tell you or you observe about them that allows you to sell anyone anything, not the product or services.
Going after that pet food and cat litter! That is a “need”.
Love, Jackie Monies
I haven’t given tv up completely, but I no longer watch or listen to news programs. I do read things on the Interwebz and manage to stay current, but not watching is better for my blood pressure. There are several shows I do watch, but since we fired our cable company I watch them on HULU and NetFlix.
On comics, I do love Bill Cosby and of course George Carlin. As for others, there’s Jeff Foxworthy (you may be a redneck if…) Bill Engvall, and Eddie Izzard. Eddie is from England, so his comedy has a slightly different tilt to it, and he never fails to make me laugh.
Debbe, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjF1bG5LUcs
Huh. Whada ya know? Fish flinging.
Sometimes you see things on the InterWebNet and don’t know whether to be impressed or to just laugh. Or both.
http://www.kirotv.com/news/news/national/salmon-cannon-could-save-fish-firing-them-air/ng3CL/
On way to grocery I learned: Today is 37 anniversary of Elvis’ death from Oldies station.
From emails I learned the six rules of cleavage etiquette. Obviously Kardasians are not on same mailing list. I bet Ghost knows them.
By observation: most people out and about on Saturday morning in a small town have gray hair and a cane, a brace or a limp but they are still moving.
The teenagers seemed to be in park in folding chairs and red tee shirts, so some kind of fund raiser? But I saw seniors in front of businesses too, so maybe two fund raisers?
Not many boats on lake, so fish may not be biting. Or there is no bass tournament or crappie tournament being held.
Love, Jackie
Good morning, all. It’s a beautiful morning, here, and we are almost done for the weekend
Favorite thing I had said about me yesterday: I was helping The Man IN My LIfe empty the dishwasher, and he glared at a knife and said, “If I could find a dishwasher that would remove peanut butter, I’d marry it!”
Me: You’re already married.”
“Then I’d commit trigamy!”
“You mean bigamy”
“No, I’d marry you, too. If I’m going to get in trouble, I’m at least going to have some fun!”
Gotta watch out for those 70-year-old guys, Munchkin. I know. I plan on being one of them some day. 🙂
Jackie, what is this cleavage etiquette of which you speak? And does it apply to the owner of the cleavage or the observer of the cleavage?
Since they made Jackie laugh, More Mitch Hedberg jokes:
I like refried beans. That’s why I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they’re just as good and we’re just wasting time. You don’t have to fry them again after all.
My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said ‘No, but I want a regular banana later, so… yeah.’
I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You’ll be mad, but it will be too late.
My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don’t really know what’s happening down there. Who is the real hero?
I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn’t have one. So I got a cake.
I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn’t work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
It’s very dangerous to wave to people you don’t know because what if they don’t have hands? They’ll think you’re cocky.
Aaand, the one she’ll prolly like best:
You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something.
Ghost, the cleavage etiquette was for the owner of said breasts. That is why I laughed and said the K girls don’t know it.
Or maybe the butt etiquette either.
Lily, I love the jokes. I get a lot sent to me by friends and passed on and wonder if there is a joke app and I need one?
One of the etiquette rules was if you are 60 to 70 you do not go braless or wear pushup bras and low cut blouses. One so you don’t flop when you walk and one so you don’t push the wrinkles up into an unnatural position under your chin.
Remember Blanche on Golden Girls and all the flat on your back looking up at chin jokes?
When I was young and buxom I could still pass a pencil test but now I could carry a roll of quarters around I think!
Love, Jackie Monies
Made me think about humor (especially Southern) and why we enjoy it, which applies to comics as well of course.
“Southern writers have a reckless abandon when telling all, they just unplug it and let go.”
In honor of two funny southerners, “Elvis Is Dead and I’m Not Feeling Well Myself” by Lewis Grizzard and Dave Barry who as columnists have to come up with something funny just about every day. Lewis G. can be excused now, as he has passed on.
Eudora Welty, William Faulkner and Fannie Flagg can be hilarious and Ray Blount, Jr. is funny. The South has a ton of writers who I enjoy and go to http://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/southern-humor
Love, Jackie Monies
Happy birthday Debbe! Hope you have a great day! Kitty with the chicken hat is adorable! What a face!
I don’t want to pack! Blacklight has the right idea, she’s off taking a nap.
Happy Birthday and I love the kitty too. Looks like my Garfield. I had three identical ones like this, could not tell who I was taking to vet. He is only one left.
He sleeps with me, often on my head and weighs about 20#, big feet too.
Love, Jackie
Happy birthday, Debbe!
Jackie, how about Margaret Mitchell, Harper Lee, Flannery O’Connor and Walker Percy? I never have been able to get into Faulkner, though Heaven knows I’ve tried.
Ghost, you can’t work in a kitchen together without a little flirting. BTW, he had his sixty-sixth birthday last month. Maybe his best years are ahead of him?He has framed and hung in the kitchen this drawing of me! http://i1306.photobucket.com/albums/s565/Lilyblack1/SusieSous-Chef_zps0bf8dc1d.jpg
Lily: Who’s the officer[?] in the burnt orange uniform with all the buttons and with epaulets?
Happy Birthday Debbe! I got you beat in the age thing, but you got me beat in the energy thing… just keep on truckin’!
emb: That is Sir John Moore, killed at Corunna in 1809.
Not a drum was heard, not a funeral note,
As his corse to the rampart we hurried;
Not a soldier discharged his farewell shot
O’er the grave where our hero we buried.
….
Slowly and sadly we laid him down,
From the field of his fame fresh and gory;
We carved not a line, and we raised not a stone,
But we left him alone with his glory.
-Wolfe
We used to keep framed prints of people Mike admired like Washington, Jefferson, Andrew Jackson, etc. in our house. I would think easily recognized by any one who took American history. My mom was looking at some in my office and asked if they were members of Mike’s family? I said we wish.
One of my favorite Southern authors who now does a monthly column for Southern Living is Rick Bragg. He is funny. His southern dialects are right on. He deserves his Pulitzer.
“Charlie would shout to the old men fishing from the banks.
“Got the time?”
“Alabamer time?” the old men would ask. “Or Georgia time?”
“They have passed on, of course— Charlie, Edna, even Linda. The houseboat is in ruin.”
“But they are not gone. Nobody is, on Alabama time.”
Favorite quote for my Alabama and Southern friends. Nobody is gone on Alabama time.
Love, Jackie
I think we’ve discussed passwords – remembering them, changing them, and how ridiculous some are required to be. The latter and the frequency with which we are forced to change them are among the things I won’t miss when I retire at the end of this school year. Meanwhile, I may have to try this guy’s approach – https://medium.com/@manicho/how-a-password-changed-my-life-7af5d5f28038
Jackie: Huh. We used to take Southern Living, but nobody ever read it, and The Boss Of My Life quit subscribing, about the time when we quit subscribing to Time, The New Yorker, and The Dallas Morning News. The only things we still subscribe to are Architectural Digest, Texas Monthly, National Geographic, and Smithsonian.
One thing I do remember from William Faulkner: “The past is never dead. It’s not even past.” From Requiem For a Nun, I believe
Lily:
Thanks. Went to
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Corunna
and learned stuff.
Peace, emb
And today’s real time strip is great! I am guilty of flopping over the back of the couch that way!
Munchkin, I understand. I can hardly do anything anywhere without a little (OK, a lot of) flirting. Sorry I prematurely aged The Man in Your Life. I could have sworn you had mentioned that he was 70. But of course I plan on being 66 one day, also.
The cleavage rules reminded me someone I saw in a clinic the last time I took my Mom in to have blood drawn for some lab work…a slender, tall and tanned blonde with long hair, wearing, in no particular order, a very snugly-fitting gray skirt with a hem that ended above mid-thigh; shoes that were what I call “hooker clogs”; and a red, flowing blouse (or at least that’s what a young lady of my acquaintance told me they are called) with enough buttons undone to display the obligatory amount of cleavage. Having met more than a few of her breed, I immediately thought, “Pharmaceutical rep.” Which fact was verified when I finally got around to looking for and finding her name tag.
What she wore would have been perfect attire for an interesting date, but in a professional setting, not so much. (And no, not all of them dress that way. But a lot do.) I long ago posited that pharmaceutical marketing departments must assume that 1) all physicians are male, and 2) sex sells. While the latter assumption is probably still true, the former one is quite a bit outdated. Although, for all I know, they use hunky male reps to call on female docs.
Huh, maybe that explains theverything cuteness of some of MY vendor reps…. Never put two and two together. Doesn’t work, but I appreciate the effort.????
Yeah, still dodging the packing boxes.
And I dropped Smithsonian for same reason! Isn’t it nice to be rich enough to be a snob?
I in turn haven’t looked at Architectural Digest since the late 80’s when one of the houses I did flowers for made the magazine. The rich doctor who bought it when asked by the interior decorator if he wouldn’t like some of the family’s personal possessions incorporated in the show home (it won best home award of course)
His reply? The family could only bring suitcases from their old home, he wanted house to appear exactly as it did in the magazine. No changes.
He paid millions for the house and contents, so of course he will leave the house as shown in the magazine on the coffee table.
This in turn bores me!
I am getting dirt from weeding flower beds in my keyboard.
And I dropped Smithsonian for same reason! Isn’t it nice to be rich enough to be a snob?
I in turn haven’t looked at Architectural Digest since the late 80’s when one of the houses I did flowers for made the magazine. The rich doctor who bought it when asked by the interior decorator if he wouldn’t like some of the family’s personal possessions incorporated in the show home (it won best home award of course)
His reply? The family could only bring suitcases from their old home, he wanted house to appear exactly as it did in the magazine. No changes.
He paid millions for the house and contents, so of course he will leave the house as shown in the magazine on the coffee table.
This in turn bores me!
I am getting dirt from weeding flower beds in my keyboard.