A pithy comic strip about life, love, lust and puthy cats.

Est. 1985

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The Secret Formula

By Jimmy Johnson


Buy the new book, "Beaucoup Arlo & Janis!"Today's "Arlo & Janis!"
I’m not here to preach, but I am convinced one of the best things I ever did for my health was give up soft drinks. Of course, we’re talking a real habit in my case, several cans a day or, worse, endless pours from two-liter bottles. All this was in addition to the drinks that came with all my numerous fast-food meals. I tapered off after a heart attack, and a few years ago I gave up sugary drinks altogether—and their sugar-free substitutes. This was in addition to many other dietary changes I was making, but it all seemed to work for me. On another topic, I grew up in the American south. A “Coke” was any cola-flavored drink: Coca-Cola, Royal Crown, Double Cola and, of course, when you could find one, Pepsi. The first time I traveled outside the south I was amazed at the proliferation of Pepsi machines and the dearth of Coca Cola machines. This may sound like a small thing to you, but it was a cultural ground tremor for me. I suppose it was thoughts such as this that led to the 1995 Sunday Arlo & Janis above.

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85 responses to “The Secret Formula”

  1. Charlotte in NH Avatar
    Charlotte in NH

    I think I’m getting mixed up about what day I’m posting at! But anyhow, we aren’t seeing anything from Jackie — I hope she is okay, and the rest of the family tool

    Dear eMb, the reference to Pirates of Penzance baffles me … can you help me out, please?

  2. Charlotte in NH Avatar
    Charlotte in NH

    Jackie and I were posting at about the same time; so good to hear that she is okay, but oh dear, what a lot of hardship she has to go through! Here’s hoping for better days.

  3. emeritus minnesota biologist Avatar
    emeritus minnesota biologist

    Charlotte:

    It’s near the end of Act I, after General Stanley’s patter song, ‘I am the very model of a modern Major General’ and before his song claiming that he is an orphan boy. It takes more than a page of tiresome dialog. Most G&S records/CDs leave out all or most of the dialog.

    My ref. for such things is Modern Library’s ‘The complete plays of Gilbert and Sullivan’, no copyright date, but I suspect I’ve owned it more than 60 yr. The only error I’ve found in is the ‘and’ on the cover and title page. The partners were professionally known as ‘Gilbert & Sullivan.’ The words and music are now P.D.

    Unfortunately, that has allowed some to do violence to the plays, ‘Pirates’ in particular. Much of the time now, if you go to a production of ‘Pirates’ today, it will be the Broadway remake that became popular in the ’80s, both here and in the UK. Among other problems, it includes a patter song in Act II lifted from another G&S opera, ‘Ruddigore’, which makes no sense at that point in ‘Pirates.’

    Peace, emb

  4. emeritus minnesota biologist Avatar
    emeritus minnesota biologist

    All:

    Aside from the minor typos in my last post, I neglected to specify that’s it’s all a play on the similarity [esp. in the UK] of the sounds of ‘often’ and ‘orphan.’ Brits don’t sound that ‘r’. Peace, emb

  5. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    Charlotte et al: Thanks for your expressions of concern for my Mom. As I mentioned, I took her to her PCP today, who is a not only a wonderfully patient and caring doctor but a friend as well. Jackie, you will probably understand this, based on your experiences…in the past few months, my Mom has undergone radiation therapy; has been hospitalized for atrial fibrillation, CHF and an extremely rapid and erratic heartbeat; and has suffered from pretty serious chronic fatigue. So guess what her major complaint was today? Sinusitis. You gotta laugh.

    But I *can* laugh now, because her doc has decreased her hypertension meds, which should help with the fatigue; the sinusitis med he started her on today is already clearing her up; and she is already doing remarkably well dealing with everything else.

    Even when life is not entirely good, it could always be worse.

  6. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    GR6, some have been pronouncing blogging dead for several years. IMHO blogging has a bright future. I have seen blogs die, reborn, or just fade away. Blogging is a long-tail activity; a few have a large following, most exist on a small group of active followers. Viewed this way, blogging is a form of social media.

    Unlike Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn; blogging tends to be unidirectional. It depends on a leader (often unrewarded) to build, maintain, and oversee it. As Jimmy may attest, it can be expensive and time consuming activity.

  7. hc Avatar
    hc

    You could all do me a favor and drink Tropicana ( made by Pepsi) – I have Pepsi stock and like their dividends … but I never touch the stuff (or anything fizzy for that matter)
    and as for cold tea (sweet no less!!!) – we Brits don’t drink cold tea, and the Americans don’t drink warm beer – all’s fair?

  8. Dennis Ewing Avatar
    Dennis Ewing

    I live in San Antonio and I know the big sellers are either Dr Pepper and Big Red. I have the diabetes and still manage to be able to have 2 regular DPs a day. Worked into what I’m allowed. I’d rather be dead young than live a long time miserable. If I can’t have my DP why bother at all?

  9. Outlander Avatar
    Outlander

    I rarely drink soft drinks, but, when I do, it’s Coke followed by Dr. Pepper in a distant second.

    Coke just doesn’t taste the same anymore, though, because of corn syrup sugar. I long for the cane-sugar Coke of my youth.

    I once heard that the Coke bottled and sold in Mexico is cane sugar and that smugglers bring in the good stuff to sell up here. That’s not a joke.

  10. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    On topic of cigarettes. GR6 is a Marlboro man, while I am a Camel smoker.

  11. Mark in TTown Avatar
    Mark in TTown

    My grandfather, (born 1906) called them all co-coler. Culture shock: my ex(from the Buffalo area) went to Atlanta for job training. She tried to order a diet Pepsi in a restaurant there and the waitress said, “Honey, you’re in the South!”.

  12. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Texans will admit to addiction to cold sweet beverages at all meals. Deep South like Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Texas, Arkansas, they almost automatically bring you sweet tea unless you specify.

    I have had Texas friends stock their businesses with multiple soda machines full of THEIR favorites, a doctor who kept an ice chest full of Dr. Pepper in his Porsche’s trunk in case of crisis and many others who did similar “emergency” preparations. I used to pack an entire suitcase with canned Diet Coke or Tab (whichever I was drinking) and ship it on cruises, vacations to Mexico and anywhere I thought they might not have it. I took it with me when I was a floral show designer and stuck it under the design table and sucked it down for the caffeine.

    When I had a REALLY tough or fast project, my helpers would pop open TWO diet sodas (see above) and tell me it was a two Coke/Tab job. I lived on them, at least a 12 pack a day or more but diet.

    Never knew North Carolina was Pepsi Country until I had to go out regularly for meetings with Lowe’s. After a dozen stops at convenience stores and NO Diet Cokes, my boss told me to stuff it until Lowes and they would get me a Coke. Which they cheerfully did, a Diet Pepsi! Boss kicked me under table, I thanked them and gagged it down.

    So, I took my own Diet Coke along to NC from then on, just like to Mexico.

    Love, Jackie

  13. Mark in TTown Avatar
    Mark in TTown

    Outlander, Sam’s club sells Mexican Coca-Cola by the case and Wal*Mart has it by the bottle. Also Sprite and Orange Fanta. There is a difference in taste, to me.

  14. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    NO!!!!! Tell me it isn’t so, Ghost and Sand, you both smoke?

    You are intelligent, sweet, charming, funny and I will assume both good looking and you smoke?

    I am dashed, crushed and disappointed.

    Love, Jackie

  15. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    There is a difference in Coca Cola bottled in the small old fashioned glass bottles, plastic bottles, cans, etc. I have had it scientifically explained to me but it has to do with pressurization of the carbonated beverage and the type of container, lids/seal, how much it “leaks” the gas (which is what makes it go “flat” and taste bad after awhile) Even the size of container makes a difference, so that is why the big giant plastic bottles go flat so fast, that and the “thin” plastic bottles and the plastic caps which can’t take much pressure.

    Now that I cannot get glass bottles I prefer aluminum cans and refuse to drink fountain drinks or plastic bottles, especially the big ones. Energy drinks are taking over cooler space, so soon we will not have canned sodas, although Coke has introduced a big tall can with more soda and more profit, I suppose. Taste is good too.

    I drank Coke as soon as I was weaned, even when I was anorexic I still drank Coke even though there were no diet ones back then.

    Coke is the official beverage in more places than Atlanta!

    Love, Jackie

  16. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    Chinese Diet Coke uses a very distinct sweetner that most Americans don’t like. Loon drinks it withouy blinking. This from the women who won’t touch the inflight box lunches served on domestic Chinese flights.

  17. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    Mark, I am not sure either of my grandfathers drank anything bottled that hadn’t also been distilled first. For the record, one was born in 1875, the other in 1890.The older smoked a pipe, the younger smoked cigars. Both reached 90, they did something right.

  18. Ruth Anne in Winter Park Avatar
    Ruth Anne in Winter Park

    I agree that Coke doesn’t quite taste the same as it did when I was growing up – when there was always a case of bottles in our house. Part of it is probably glass vs cans or plastic but I’ve also heard about the difference in sugar vs corn syrup. Somewhere I read that in areas with large Jewish populations you can find the cane sugar version during Passover (identified by a different color cap). Apparently there is a chance of fermentation during the corn process that makes that version not kosher for Passover.

  19. emeritus minnesota biologist Avatar
    emeritus minnesota biologist

    GR6 and Sand:

    IMO, Jackie is right on. I watched a son smoke [no, I wasn’t there all the time] for 30+ yr. He found quitting that much harder than EOH [been sober over a decade now]. Late 50s now, no signs yet, but it could still happen. If tobacco were newly discovered, rather than a socially and ECONOMICALLY embedded thing, it would simply be another illegal drug. [Not that that works well, either.] How do the tobacco barons sleep nights? Some of them may even be among the hypocrites claiming ‘America is a Christian nation.’

    Peace, emb

  20. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    emb and others. How can society come down on smoking one plant (tobacco) while legalizing the smoking of another (marijuana)?

  21. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    Jackie/emb: sandcastler™ is just pulling your leg, I suppose about me being “the Marlboro Man” type.

    I did in fact start smoking in high school (everybody was doing it) and continued through college (everybody was doing it) and my Air Force years (everybody was doing it). When I lost the Base Exchange subsidized pricing I decided, “This is not only stupid, it’s getting expensive.” I enjoyed every cigarette I ever lit, but like Jackie, I quit cold turkey, using the “put-it-out-and-never-light-another-one” system.

    I’ve heard that kicking nicotine addiction is harder than kicking heroin, but if so, what I had must have been just a simple habit (finish a meal, light up; sip a cocktail, light up; etc.) and not an addiction, as I have never missed smoking nor have I craved another cigarette. They say you immediate notice a difference in the way you feel physically when you quit, and although I never particularly did, it did make me feel better about myself.

  22. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Twenty years ago when I moved to Oklahoma from Houston the local paper here in town headlined “Bumper Pot Crop Predicted” and I said “Oh my Gosh, Oklahoma has legalized marijuana!”

    It turns out they were discussing the aerial surveillance projections for illegal growing of the crop, not legal growers.

    I was interested in buying a mountain for sale here until I found out the entire crest was planted in marijuana fields being watered from the small lake up on top of mountain. And the growers were definitely NOT wanting anyone to buy their mountain and put a log cabin up on the lake shore!

    Back in early 60’s when I was in ag school, we had a Mexican/American who kept telling us his family had sent him to United States agriculture school to study field crops to increase their drug production. Us dummy farmer types had never seen a marijuana plant and had to look up what one looked like.

    Turns out the kid was telling the truth.

    Love, Jackie

  23. sideburns Avatar

    There’s another reason for using real sugar during Passover, Jackie. Ashkenazim aren’t allowed to eat seeds, which lets out both corn and rice. Sephardi, however, don’t follow that ruling, so to some extent, it depends on what background the person comes from.

  24. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    Jackie, why do you think they refer to northeast Oklahoma as “Green Country?”

  25. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Okay, Ghost, you are back in my good graces for quitting! It is true, I went from smoking nonstop to quitting cold turkey and have never lit another cigarette, nor can I tolerate being around any smoke or people with smoke on their clothing, hair, skin. As my dog sitter and other employees smoke, it is hard for me to get close to them without coughing. They do not smoke in house but outside in yard or decks. But I can smell their clothing and it is hard to not gag.

    I do not mean they repulse me but I am hypersensitive to the smell and fumes.

    Sand, if you are serious I will still forgive you but hope you will quit. See above note about people I like who smoke and I lecture endlessly!

    Love, Jackie