Someone requested more of the “Vince” strips. I did get sort of distracted after I began this story arc. After beginning it, I was reminded looking through the old stuff that Vince was something of a recurring character in the spring of 1993, a sounding board for Janis. All the arcs are similar in nature, so I have abandoned chronological order and for the rest of the week will offer what I call “The Best of Vince.”
Male Bonding Does Not Involve Duct Tape
By Jimmy Johnson
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293 responses to “Male Bonding Does Not Involve Duct Tape”
OK, Jackie, you got me the other day. With the addition of the Emerson-designed Kershaw knife I received for my birthday, I now have on me, or within easy reach, four folding knives…two from Spyderco, one from Gerber and the Kershaw. Not that I particularly worry that “guns don’t always work”, but even with a permit to carry, there are places where I cannot legally go armed. Such as the post office.
If I made my living as a mugger, that’s where I’d hang out waiting for victims. The facility has no security to speak of, especially after hours, and lawbreakers, who by definition pay no attention to the law, can be reasonably sure honest and law-abiding people are not armed. (Of course, it would be hilarious if one mugger tried to mug another mugger.) But I figure even the most persistent mugger, if he gets close enough to me, would be put off his feed by a spurting artery or a, oh, I don’t know, perhaps a sucking chest wound. Or the righteous fear of being given such, anyway.
Plus knives are immensely useful tools for dealing with modern everyday life. You can open envelopes, cut packing tape on packages, and even free your purchases from the @&$*!# blister pack armor they often come encased in.
For radiator hose leaks: Google “silicon rescue tape”. It’s inexpensive and worked for two weeks for me (until my SIL was available to replace the hose). One caution: Be sure you can wrap the tape around the hose at the leak before opening the package… once the tape is exposed to air it starts hardening.
How did I become Anonymous? Silly Computer!
Forgot I hadn’t actually read the day’s new strip and went over. Got part way down TDS and a fight was breaking out!
They must regard us as boring. May they continue to dwell “over there.”
Ghost, mom and I just finished eating breakfast, despite how bad I feel this morning. Even the 10# Rottweiler wasn’t too fond of the smoked link beef sausage substituted for the bacon today! I did remember to take all my meds except the ones daughter and husband forgot to pick up for me at Wally World pharmacy. Half the time I end up taking morning meds at night!
David, you get well, you hear? And all the rest of the Village, don’t cut any arteries while cooking TG dinner. I laughed about Ghost saying our insurance policy for the Village was going to go up because of all us. I don’t think we could actually qualify for anything but a group policy with really good coverage!
Love you all, Jackie
Since I had to make a medical house call at breakfast time, I did a brunch a bit ago. It was worth waiting for…3-egg omelet with diced smoked ham and Swiss cheese, with whole wheat toast and tomato juice. Of course, that means a green salad for lunch, but it was worth that, too.
Ghost, why have you not been snagged long ago by a decent woman? Or an indecent one, whichever you’d like.
It is pouring down rain here and porch is flooded, as rock mason still has to cut out the driveway and install the “cattle guard” style ditch to catch water running down drive.
We will probably have leftover Chinese takeout from last night!
Mama has a big container of egg drop soup to eat. I bet my Chinese chef sent it gratis, they are always doing stuff like that.
I need to take him a big jar of honey for TG GIFT. He takes it for his allergies.
Lordy, my allergies are horrible. I bet he knows something I don’t. I gave up the local unpasteurized honey for diabetes.
How are we all doing Thanksgiving? Inquiring minds………..
Love, Jackie
Why make one woman miserable when I can make so many of them happy? 🙂
Incorrigible!
Holidays haven’t been the same for us since we lost my sister last year. My Thanksgiving meal last year was eaten in a hospital dining room, not knowing she had less than a week to live. My brother-in-law did prepare a Christmas meal for my Mom and me last year, in my sister’s memory, and that was really all the celebrating we did.
I need to check to see if he is planning to cook for Thanksgiving, or if he is going out of town to visit with his family. (He has two brothers who are not doing well, healthwise.) Alternately, I will prepare a turkey breast and some trimmings for my Mom and myself.
I know that some people dread having to be with family at Thanksgiving, but I wish I could be with all of mine this year.
Ghost Rider 6 ‘. . .. Jackie, in olden days, attorneys became attorneys by “reading law” with a practicing attorney, or so I’ve been told.’
In G&S’s ‘HMS Pinafore’, Sir Joseph Porter, First Lord of the Admiralty, sings of his rise to that station despite no acquaintance with seafaring. En route, he became a lawyer by first starting as ‘an office boy for an attorney’s firm.’ Later, ‘of legal knowledge I acquired such a grip that they took me into the partnership.’ Basically, he ‘read law.’
Somebody, in a recent post, said he [I think] could not understand why any supt. of schools should get a 6-figure salary. Neither can I.
I don’t know if the term ‘earn’ was used. Personally, I don’t think anyone ‘earns’ a 6-figure annual income, much less a 7 or 8-figure one. I’m willing to concede that short-lived careers [e.g., pugilist, which I abhor, or some movie stardoms, which I avoid] should have an age factor put in, but otherwise, nobody is worth that much to society. I also have little idea how all this could be put into effect in a free society [but wonder how free some ‘free’ societies are]. Peace, emb
I was checking on today’s televised football games (the start of Kansas at Oklahoma is in a weather delay, so Jackie is not kidding about the rain), when some company’s commercial offered me the “opportunity” to invest in silver. They are flogging it as a wonderful investment, since according to them silver is currently selling at below its “production cost”.
Wait, what? Wouldn’t that be the definition of “totally worthless”, sort of like “not worth the paper it’s printed on”? Yeah, gimme some of that.
Mike and I are both only children and we are down to just my mom. We will stay here because of the cancer treatment but also because Mike can’t stand the pain from bouncing on rough roads in car. Even with the morphine patch.
I still have a couple of frozen turkeys we need to eat up, so I am going to haul one out today to begin defrosting. It may take until Wednesday to thaw one.
Mike hauled a couple bags of sweet potatoes from Aldi’s yesterday, so definitely sweet potatoes and cornbread stuffing and green beans with bacon and bacon fat and more bacon fat. I have about 50# of shelled pecans, so definitely pecan pie. Maybe apple pie too, it is Mike’s favorite, and there is a case of apples in laundry room as well.
Monday is Mike’s last radiation treatment from this series, so hopefully he’ll feel well on Thursday. Hope everyone does, including me.
Love, Jackie
I have one living aunt and Mike has none. He has one living cousin and I have a pack of first and seconds.
Understanding exactly what you mean, Ghost.
emb 11:54 I often thought the same about the millions people like Letterman, Leno, etc make, well, the networks make so much money from the commercial revenue, they in essence do “earn” what they make. I mean, I think it’s a crazy waste of money all around, but hey, if it works for them. About a free society, just heard on Fox we’re like down to twenty on the freedom index, under Malta and Uruguay, it seems they don’t have an IRS harassing political opposition or government investigation of churches preaching non-politically correct scripture. ….. ….. … way up where people were talking about off camera food spitting – Mel Blanc in his autobiography “That’s Not All Folks” said he really did crunch carrots when doing Bugs Bunny, hated carrots and kept a bucket next to him….. …. … .. Zicam does work for me in greatly reducing colds, no sore throat, runny eyes, fever or tired sick feeling Just am curious though, how much snot can a human body produce before it starts using up muscle?
Jackie 12:07 going through that now with wife, very painful in the car, we have a Volvo SUV, she has a sleeping bag in back with an extra piece of foam doubled over in it, she’s usually alright sitting in front as long as she can twist and turn, it seems after months of juggling methadone and morphine she has a pretty good handle on it. The worst is never knowing outcomes of the treatment. Several cancer areas in her body, so they change what cancer they treat it like, up, down, back, forth, good days, bad days, close to getting into two clinical trials, nixed at last minute, on second combo of chemo now. Lost a lot of weight, but you could see her out in the yard and not think anything was wrong
If only we were all so wise as to always be right about the length of life vs. quality of life issue. Some would probably have thought me crazy to recommend radiation therapy for my Mom at her age. But I didn’t give whit whether it added a single day to her life, as long as those days she had were as pain-free and comfortable for her as possible. So far, praise the Lord, that seems to have been a good call.
Jackie, one of my church members in Tennessee had reached the no close relative point, nor did his wife have anybody close. Rather than go to a solitary holiday at Thanksgiving, they started inviting others who didn’t have family either to have Thanksgiving with them. He and a friend would deep fry a couple of turkeys, and the guests would bring the other items with them. The times my ex and I spent with them was the best Thanksgiving we had during our marriage, being the closest to my family experience.
I got my fixation device off yesterday and am cleared to return to work Monday. Might be working Thanksgiving since I no longer have any vacation time and don’t want to lose that day’s pay. Don’t mind as no plans for that day anyway.
The Knights of Columbus work with our Catholic Church as well as Lutheran, Apostolic, and Methodist churches to have a Thanksgiving Day Luncheon for people that otherwise might be alone. It’s free and starts at noon, so it is possible to volunteer and still be with family later in the day.
I have attended a few funeral luncheons and the last time that I went, several others that I thought would be there did not attend, so it was kind of awkward to find a place to sit as I did not know anybody. However for folks attending this Luncheon, it might be a great way to get human contact on a potentially depressing day
Abrupt change of topic. You would think that if someone were murdered and burned in your living room fireplace in the 1924-1926 period you could find a newspaper article about it!
I have been searching old archives and I even know the man’s name, but no luck!
Used to hate to have to mop the floor where his body was burned, it never went away until we put plywood floors down after we tore the old fireplace out of house. Funny thing is I thought this occurred back in 1800’s, not in 1900’s.
Going to search some more!
Love, Jackie
Jackie, Google has a large archive of old newspapers. Try them. Or if you want to give a name and location, I’ll help you look.
Jackie: . . .. We will probably have leftover Chinese takeout from last night! . . .. How are we all doing Thanksgiving? Inquiring minds. . ..
A number of churches [but not all who could easily manage it] rotate a TG midday dinner. Can’t remember which one it is next week, but will find out at UMC tomorrow. Wife [I’ve mentioned this before, I’m sure] and I used to wait table or even manage the DR at some off these, but now I’m just a guest. They’re free, and there is rarely any churchy pressure. I generally write a check if I can find someone authorized to take it. Could have mailed one earlier, but I’ve mislaid [geezer style] the flyer that was in the UMC bulletin a few weeks back. Not just poor folks; see a number of retired faculty or widowed spouses there.
Last name was Cardwell, no known first name. Died in Tensas Parish, Louisiana most likely date 1924-1926 on Newlight Plantation (which is also a village name during that period)
New Light or Newlight, spelled both ways. Closest town is Newellton, LA
Newspaper was Tensas Gazette, close by newspapers in that period were the Franklin Sun. Monroe, Louisiana and Natchez, Mississippi papers also reported on that area.
You seem to be a whiz on finding stuff!
My aunt says she was too small to remember much but says there may have been a cover up of death. Motive was robbery, victim had sold cotton crops and had large sum of money in cash.
Love, Jackie
Our families were never large either. We’re down to 2 nephews and their wives in DC on my side; Bob has a sister, her daughter and daughter’s husband in Savannah. There are assorted cousins but none that are holiday close. We usually go to Savannah but are staying home this year and doing a smallish meal for just us. We bought half a turkey breast and a couple of thighs; we’ll have oyster dressing, some sort of frozen veg, cranberry orange relish, and sour orange pie (like key lime but made with orange/lemon juice mixture).
Not neglecting family entirely this season. We’re going to Richmond Hill (just south of Savannah) in a couple of weeks for a special event at Ft. MacAlister State Park where Bob’s sister is a park naturalist. Every December they have a “muster” and re-enactment of the Civil War battle that occurred there; this year it happens to fall on the actual date. It was after the fort fell that Sherman wired Lincoln with the message that for Christmas he was presenting him the city of Savannah. This is the 150th anniversary so it promises to be a big deal.
And then we’ll be back up there for Christmas.
I use a PowerPoint slide show on the TV monitors in the high school library where I work to promote coming events (games, concerts, etc.) and other announcements. This month I’ve been adding quotes related to gratitude, taken from a lovely little book called Saying Grace: Blessings for the Family Table. I’ll share a few here over the next few days, starting with this one that seems especially appropriate –
Blessed are we who can laugh at ourselves,
For we shall never cease to be amused.
~ Anonymous