A pithy comic strip about life, love, lust and puthy cats.

Est. 1985

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More Computer-Generated Humor

By Jimmy Johnson


Buy the new book, "Beaucoup Arlo & Janis!"Today's "Arlo & Janis!"
Judging from the appearance of this simple Sunday cartoon from May, 2007, I was in a hurry when I drew it. Believe it or not, it happens. Its saving grace is the joke, though; I like it. It’s humorous and—I like to think—original. That’s what you shoot for. Many times over my career, I’ve had conversations with people who ask a variation of the question, “So, you could, like, draw six months ahead and take six months off?!” Technically, the answer is, Yes. The question almost always is asked with the breath of incredulity, and I know they’re wishing they could work that way. Perhaps they could. I can’t. I can’t get so much as a week ahead, and I do try. For 30 years, I have tried. At least I am reconciled to the fact that’s the way it is. I’m just lucky to have this gig at all.

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221 responses to “More Computer-Generated Humor”

  1. Ruth Anne in Winter Park Avatar
    Ruth Anne in Winter Park

    Anyone who likes basketball who is not watching the women’s tournament is missing some great games. While I would love to see Florida State, my alma mater, in the Final Four, mostly I’m for whoever has the best chance to beat UConn!

  2. emb Avatar
    emb

    “You’d be able to tell, Jackie. Different accents.” This true, and there was a woman on some recent site who imitated several of them. She was right on for some, but I hadn’t heard several she did, and she owned there were more. Lincolnshire, Yorkshire, Lancashire, Edinburgh, West End London [actual residents closest to “received pronunciation”], East London and more [= Cockney], Somerset [Zummerzet], are amazingly different.

    A good place to hear several is to listen on MPR and other stations to the live broadcast of Nine Lessons and Carols from Kings College Chapel at Cambridge U. at 0900 CST 24 Dec. ’15 [1500 GMT], rebroadcast on MPR at 1700 CST or so. The readers are different every year, but usually vary widely.

    “Great Courses” lectures on history of religions in America = 24 half-hour lectures by a Brit historian who pretty much uses the “received pronunciation” but who someone might spot as being from Shropshire, Manchester, or whatever. I listen to these in the car, and am about halfway through: religion in the Civil War. Lay and clergy on both sides believed God was on their side. Considering what side “won”, it might surprise some who is “winning” now.

    Peace, emb

  3. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Rex Harrison made me start thinking about British accents of course. My Fair Lady and teaching a cockney street girl to speak. Being American, I butcher it, my English is as bad as Miss Piggy’s French. In fact I do probably speak English like Miss Piggy.

    I remember working on a college summer stock performance in 1960s and all parts played by Southern actors, we were incongruous I know. We got to use the Broadway costumes as it had just closed on Broadway.

    No one will ever mistake me as anything but Southern woman but when I was over in southern states so long, hearing the accents was just delightful, the women especially who have a melodic voice. Had entire table of garden club or church ladies near me in one restaurant, very upscale bunch of it was so sweet hearing them carry on.

  4. TruckerRon Avatar

    For those who enjoyed the “Take Flight” video, here’s the behind the scenes piece, including an explanation of what the artist was trying to convey:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=viNb_51rnTA

  5. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    I’m back. In addition to the same problems of access to this blog others have experienced (using both IE and Chrome), my area had a near-24-hour telco DSL outage from yesterday evening to this afternoon.

    Speaking of groups of dressed-to-the-nines Southern ladies, during my freshman-sophomore summer break I worked at a motel where one afternoon a month a local ladies’ bridge club met in a banquet rooms to play. Naturally, I was working the front desk when they left and, for some reason, stopped in the lobby to speak to each other. All forty of them. At one time. The next time I was exposed to that level of noise was a few years later on a flight line when a flight of F-4 Phantoms cranked up their engines.

  6. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    And speaking of bridge, I had never played until I got to college, learned the game, and got somewhat addicted to it. (Probably about a .25 GPA worth of addiction to it.) I seemed to be pretty good at it, but I wondered if that was just because I was accustomed to playing with them same group of players. That same summer a group of state social worker supervisors stayed at the motel for several weeks while auditing their local office. They were players and invited me to join them a few times; I was happy to find I could hold my own with them.

    Later, I figured out one of the lady social workers was trying to seduce me, but I was too young and dumb to realize it at the time. Pity. It could have been a real Mrs. Robinson moment. But that’s a story for the summer of the next year.

  7. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Try working the Dallas or Atlanta gift markets back in the heyday when the bus arrived from Mississippi-Louisiana-Alabama and the interior decorators and hospital volunteers and socialites with a wedding to plan descended. You needed a knife to cut the honey and syrup factor. I have seen 16-20 “buyers” arrive from one medium size hospital gift shop and all try to put the stuff they personally covet on the order for wholesale discount!

    More “Sisters” and double names than Carter had liver pills.

    Ghost, glad you are back. You obviously missed my obsession with the Ghost of Captain Gregg in the classic movie and Rex Harrison or you would have laughed at me for my fantasy life.
    Shame on you.

    Love, Jackie

  8. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    And what did you do for your summer vacation?

  9. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    Hi, Jackie.

    By the summer subsequent to the one mentioned above, 19-year-old Ghost was much worldier (ha!) than 18-year-old Ghost. So when I met a 26-year-old high-functioning alcoholic trust fund lady with hungry eyes, the was no hesitation. I did her for my summer vacation.

  10. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    Yes, Jackie, I noted your fantasy. (Well, that one, anyway.) You may recall once suggesting we collaborate on a book, and I suggested the working title of “Ghost and Mrs. Monies”. I seldom denigrate any woman’s fantasies…and never when I’m in them. 🙂

  11. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    My dear Ghost, wrong fantasy my friend.

  12. Steve From Royal Oak, MI Avatar

    I drove from Royal Oak to West Lafayette on Friday. I made quite a few trips on the old 2 lane highway from Fort Wayne to Purdue and now there is a 4 lane highway. Unfortunately, I had started drinking fluids for my marathon on Saturday and there were NO gas stations. Also, my phone had very spotty service so I wasn’t even sure where anything off the highway.

    The race started at dawn, about 19 degrees. I have worked with and taught runners on how to run marathons and I made the terrible rookie mistake of walking way too fast for the first half of the race. The last 8 miles were agony. My little brother, who has run/walked a few ultras walked with me for Mile 25. Once I only had one mile to go, I was able to push through all the aches and walk as fast as I did earlier in the race.

    I am pretty sure that this is my last marathon. It is not worth the potential injuries. But I am glad to have trained for it. That part really felt great. Of course if Boston offered a Father/Son entry for when my son qualifies…..

  13. galliglo in Ohio Avatar
    galliglo in Ohio

    Glad to be able to access the site. Havent been abke to since yesterday! Tried both IE and chrome. But I am happy now… All caught up on posts. No major medical issues or drama – the Village is seemingly content. Yay!

  14. Mark in TTown Avatar
    Mark in TTown

    Made it to the Air Show today. Was cold and overcast till about 1pm, then sun came out. Blue Angels put on a great show, lots of interesting aircraft on the static displays, too. Ghost, saw a C-47 gunship with the Spooky nose art, took some pictures. Also 2 Ospreys, a B17, B25, P51 and F22 all flew.

    Good night and pleasant dreams, all.

  15. Ghost Rider 6 Avatar
    Ghost Rider 6

    Debbe 😉 Because Al Green

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COiIC3A0ROM

  16. Debbe Avatar
    Debbe

    GR 😉 because it’s The Temptations of a fantasy

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5Z9-QCmZyw

  17. Debbe Avatar
    Debbe

    Good morning Villagers….

    I totally agree with everything you said Denise….and I’m sorry Michigan lost to KY, dang it.

    Ruth, I forget which year it was, but both the UConn men’s and women’s teams won the finals.

    And if KY takes the final….it’ll be the first time since 1976 when Indiana did it, that there were no losses. I think KY is 41 and 0…not sure.

    Oh, those were good basketball days….old Bobby Knight. Wonder what he’s doing now. One does have to admit, he was good at getting those players to win.

    Going to be a long day, had a short one yesterday. Today I have to pack, then go over to the other hen house start inspecting, and start cleaning the packer….that one I am not looking forward to…..it never gets clean properly. Egg yolk everywhere. They would just throw water on it and leave it at that. It’s so dirty, it smells. But mine doesn’t 🙂

    gotta go……

    ya’ll have a blessed Monday

    Steve, a big hoorah for you. Glad you can still pull it off. Congrats.

  18. Denise in Michigan Avatar
    Denise in Michigan

    Steve from RO, I’m so happy you were able to do this…you really are an inspiration!

  19. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Good morning all, up early again. Yes, Steve, you are inspiring. Don’t we all need that in our lives? Left piano music playing all night, unfortunately cannot hear it in bedroom! Now it’s harpsichord. Love harpsichord

    Debbe and Ghost, you are always inspiring, thought I would start your days off on a positive note.

    Wonder why I like the early morning hours when light has just arrived? I always have, the birds are just up and out in feeders, no one is moving or making noise yet.

  20. Mark in TTown Avatar
    Mark in TTown

    Jackie, find some of the combinations of piano music with nature sounds. Great to sleep/wake to. Especially rain/bird songs. Or waves hitting the beach.

  21. Mark in TTown Avatar
    Mark in TTown

    And get a small set of computer speakers that plug into the wall outlet if you are listening to music via your phone. When you travel, put the speakers in whatever room you want to listen in, plug them in and plug the input into the headset jack on your phone. Then enjoy your music. Simple, uncomplicated and whatever price level for speakers you want.

  22. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    First, I am going to have to learn how to use the phone and tablet, Mark. I am totally not tech knowledgeable! Should have hired someone to teach me. Were it not for you all I would not even know how to find anything on youtube and had no idea it existed I think.

    Real blonde, of sorts. It is a soft frosted look now, unfortunately natural frosting.

    I also own a Sirius radio apparently?

    Used to listen to the nature sounds all night on my CD player, had big collection of the soft music and put it on a loop to keep playing over and over. I was married to someone who did not share a love of music quite as much but then he was seldom home, so I could listen on my own.

  23. Mark in TTown Avatar
    Mark in TTown

    Hair color no excuse, Jackie. I was blonde as a child, then went brown. Now look brown except under strong light, then turns more silver. Got my mom’s hair color. Dad went completely white before he hit 70.

  24. sandcastler™ Avatar
    sandcastler™

    After viewing the daily offering I am thinking of lamb chops.

    Loon is into headphones. Inserts the ear buds to her phone, places cans over them. Thus can be on calls and stream music from her tablet at same time.

    Great acoustical concert.
    Rosanne Cash and Friends: Early American Guitars: https://youtu.be/1ZFjn9FfIfk

  25. Jackie Monies Avatar
    Jackie Monies

    Sand, you know what Paul McCartney said about that when they became vegetarians.